I've been pretty sick the last week or so so i've had ALOT of time to just lay around and watch TV. The constant coverage of the Mel Gibson tapes has dominated the airwaves during the day lately.
I'm conflicted on how I think about his "tapes". I'm not conflicted in that I hate what he said. I find it beyond offensive and won't EVER spend $ to buy a ticket or rent a movie of his. I can't believe that he was such a great actor that I used to think he was one of the "good guys". Married for 30 years, 37 children by the same woman, blah blah blah.....
This has all brought up thoughts I haven't had to challenge in forever. Do I think of people in terms of their color? Their ethnicity? Their lot in life? I try not to. Are their old biases that may creep in when I'm not paying attention? Yeah, probably. But I will admit to be ashamed once it happens.
My world is richer for knowing people of all colors and ethnicities. I say that, knowing I live in "white bread" North Dallas where conformity and sameness is revered. There aren't that many opportunities around here to have alot of varied expereinces, but they are available.
I listened to Mel Gibson rant about groups of people as if they were soo far less than him. He expressed hatred for people simply because they belonged to a group that he deemed less than worthy. It was an ugly deep seated gut-rot hatred!
Of course we (or at least I) know that this thinking exists, but it's rare that we see it soo raw and exposed.
It was easier to identify these bigots when they wore white coned hats. Perhaps that should be the penalty Mel gets for threatening his girlfriend and beating on her. 30 days in a white coned hat while bagging groceries for the old ladies at the local Piggly Wiggly.
It makes me wonder where that deep seated bigotry comes from and will be ever be free of it?
I look at my kids..... I don't think they even see color like we did when I was younger. It doesn't occur to them that there may be repercussions for bringing home a black friend. Or a Mexican friend. I would of thought twice. OK, maybe 3-4 times and probably then remembered it wouldn't be a good idea. It was a different time.
Another thing that caused me angst this week with regard to the same MG issue.... Many "talking heads" wondered why the girlfriend would stay if he was so ugly to her? SERIOUSLY?? We are still having this discussion?? I was afraid for my TV today. It was in danger.
If I heard one more person/man say " If it was so bad....why did she stay?" I was going to have to reach thru the tv screen and pull his testicles out thru his ears!!!!!
Sometimes women HAVE to stay. At least until they can leave. Some have to save $. Some have to have a safe exit strategy. Others have kids to be concerned about. Insurance for a chronic illness?? WHO KNOWS!!! But these people asking why she stays??? UGH!! I almost lost it a few times today.
Whether it's race issues, or compassion for people in difficult circumstances I wish we were kinder. And more helpful.
Mel Gibson..... You don't owe me an explanation, but i'd hate to be you the day you meet your maker. It may be an uncomfortable day for you, Pal.
I'm going to try to "go organic".
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Today was not a good day~
Grrrr... today was not a good day! I had to go for the deposition for an auto accident I had almost 3 years ago. (Nov 4, 2007) I was rear-ended and had some injuries to my left wrist, elbow and shoulder. 2 surgeries so far and another one to be done shortly. It's been a pain in the neck (pun intended).
Most of you know me, I'm pretty easy going and it takes ALOT to get me riled up. For the most part I've been a happy camper thru the last 2+ years. OK OK OK , I've whined abit and had occaissional bout of pissiness, but for the most part I've done what I've been told, when I've been told to do it, and my follow-thru was explemplary.
Many Dr's have been willing to treat me and do these surgeries with no payment yet, understanding that I was rear-ended and the case would eventually settle. UGH UGH UGH!!
So back to this morning.... I show up. The hitter's atty is there, the court reporter and my atty. Everyone exchanged pleasantries and the deposition began.
The questioning began...... What happened, where were you, which direction were you facing. Were you on drugs, drunk, on the phone. NO, HELL NO!!! What are/were your injuires, dates of your surgeries, names of the Dr's, therapists, etc. All very pleasantly asked by the hitters defense atty with a smile. I was really beginning to like her.
It all lasted a few hours, not too bad. I had been warned it might go 6 hours.
The last question the hitter's defense atty asked me was, "have I been pleasant and polite in conducting this deposition? Yeah, you you've been very polite and considerate, I say. She thanked me. I thanked her back.
One final question she says.......... What would your response be if my client says he never hit you? There was no "accident"?
GRRRRRRRRR... She hit my achilles heel, my sore spot! You may not like what I say, and you may not like how I say it. But don't ever assume I have lied to you. I don't lie!!
Will I tell you that the blouse looks good when it makes you look like a plum on steroids? Yeah, maybe if I know it would hurt your feelings. But I wouldn't say, "It's spectacular, you should of bought it in 3 colors!" I am not beyond trying to spare your feelings if it can be helped. But sometimes the truth is hurtful and neccesary.
The idea that I'd lie about being in a traffic accident 3 years ago and continue a "charade" is beyond explanation. That I'd take advantage of the kindness of Dr's to perform surgeries and trick them into treating me for something that didn't happen ticked me off!! I AM NOT LYING! and for her to insinuate that I am was beyond my limit.
Would I make up crap to hurt you, or take advantage of you. NO, HELL NO!!!
You can call me names, you can judge my character, you can avoid me if i'm unpleasant, but don't EVER call me a liar!!
I would of liked to rip her tonsils out thru her nostrils this morning. And it takes ALOT to rile me up.
Considering that I was never in this accident, you know... the one that never happened?... I wish someone could explain the injuries to me and why I have this chronic pain.
You may not like what I say, but I don't lie. More than that, I don't like the assumption that I do. I have given up very dear relationships where I was lied to. I have no need for liars in my life. I wouldn't even have a relationship with me, if i lied. How's that?
For many years I lied to everyone. Mostly I lied to myself. I'm done with that!! I can deal with any truth. ANY TRUTH!! I can't deal with ANY lies! And for all my efforts I refuse to be called a liar by ANYONE!! Even the hitter's defense atty who can make my life hell with a poor outcome of this trial.
Today was not a good day!
Tomorrow will be better, i'm sure.
I will write a happy blog tomorrow when this one has been forgotten.
I don't like to eat much meat.
Most of you know me, I'm pretty easy going and it takes ALOT to get me riled up. For the most part I've been a happy camper thru the last 2+ years. OK OK OK , I've whined abit and had occaissional bout of pissiness, but for the most part I've done what I've been told, when I've been told to do it, and my follow-thru was explemplary.
Many Dr's have been willing to treat me and do these surgeries with no payment yet, understanding that I was rear-ended and the case would eventually settle. UGH UGH UGH!!
So back to this morning.... I show up. The hitter's atty is there, the court reporter and my atty. Everyone exchanged pleasantries and the deposition began.
The questioning began...... What happened, where were you, which direction were you facing. Were you on drugs, drunk, on the phone. NO, HELL NO!!! What are/were your injuires, dates of your surgeries, names of the Dr's, therapists, etc. All very pleasantly asked by the hitters defense atty with a smile. I was really beginning to like her.
It all lasted a few hours, not too bad. I had been warned it might go 6 hours.
The last question the hitter's defense atty asked me was, "have I been pleasant and polite in conducting this deposition? Yeah, you you've been very polite and considerate, I say. She thanked me. I thanked her back.
One final question she says.......... What would your response be if my client says he never hit you? There was no "accident"?
GRRRRRRRRR... She hit my achilles heel, my sore spot! You may not like what I say, and you may not like how I say it. But don't ever assume I have lied to you. I don't lie!!
Will I tell you that the blouse looks good when it makes you look like a plum on steroids? Yeah, maybe if I know it would hurt your feelings. But I wouldn't say, "It's spectacular, you should of bought it in 3 colors!" I am not beyond trying to spare your feelings if it can be helped. But sometimes the truth is hurtful and neccesary.
The idea that I'd lie about being in a traffic accident 3 years ago and continue a "charade" is beyond explanation. That I'd take advantage of the kindness of Dr's to perform surgeries and trick them into treating me for something that didn't happen ticked me off!! I AM NOT LYING! and for her to insinuate that I am was beyond my limit.
Would I make up crap to hurt you, or take advantage of you. NO, HELL NO!!!
You can call me names, you can judge my character, you can avoid me if i'm unpleasant, but don't EVER call me a liar!!
I would of liked to rip her tonsils out thru her nostrils this morning. And it takes ALOT to rile me up.
Considering that I was never in this accident, you know... the one that never happened?... I wish someone could explain the injuries to me and why I have this chronic pain.
You may not like what I say, but I don't lie. More than that, I don't like the assumption that I do. I have given up very dear relationships where I was lied to. I have no need for liars in my life. I wouldn't even have a relationship with me, if i lied. How's that?
For many years I lied to everyone. Mostly I lied to myself. I'm done with that!! I can deal with any truth. ANY TRUTH!! I can't deal with ANY lies! And for all my efforts I refuse to be called a liar by ANYONE!! Even the hitter's defense atty who can make my life hell with a poor outcome of this trial.
Today was not a good day!
Tomorrow will be better, i'm sure.
I will write a happy blog tomorrow when this one has been forgotten.
I don't like to eat much meat.
Monday, May 31, 2010
It's Memorial Day. I have alot of random thots about today. I am very grateful to those I never met who paid the ultimate price for me. They never met me, and probably never even knew I existed but they paid that same price for me as they paid for their own Mom or sister. They paid the ultimate price so I could sit here and type anything I want. I can be ugly and critical of our goverment, and with their life they paid the cost so that I won't get hauled off by thugs in the middle of the night who think I have committed a crime if i don't spout the "party line". I'm free to sit here and be a jerk if i wanted to. I don't.
Personally, I don't know anyone that died in service to us. But a very dear girlfriend, Carol lost her husband Chris Braun in the first Gulf War. He was a pilot in the South China sea when his plane went down. I always think of her and her daughters on Memorial Day. It's got to be a difficult day for them and I will remember them in my prayers. Not only did Chris lose his life, but Carol lost a beloved husband and her daughters lost a lifetime to know their Dad. It's as close as I come to personally grieving for the soldiers that gave it all so that I can be a jerk if i want to.
I stole the following quirp from Debbie's facebook post, it was worth the crime....
"If you are able, save for them a place inside of you and save one backward glance when you are leaving for the places they can no longer go."-Major Michael O'Donnell- In remembrance of those who gave all.
Years ago during the floods in NW WA where I lived at the time I was a Red Cross volunteer. My job was to help the people that had lost EVERYTHING to the wild rivers to get beds, new underwear, some clothes to wear, diapers, formula, basic toiletries and what ever they needed to at least survive until things could be sorted out.
I remember a man that came to sit at my desk. We introduced ourselves and I asked him how I could help him the most that day. He was stoic, and brave (or maybe it was excessive pride, I can't be sure) but he told me that during the night the river had risen so fast and they were evacuated quickly. Just as they were evacuated the river took his shack and tossed it into the river along with his leg. It was his prostestic leg. He was a Vet and it was the only fake leg he had. He told me of the fight he'd had with the VA administraion to get that one. They had told him he didn't qualify for a leg, even tho he'd left his REAL leg in Vietnam. If I remember right, the story got a bit complicated. Something about he was "eligible" for a replacement leg only every 10 years? He'd had to fight hard to get this leg and was very scared that he'd not get a replacement for the one the river took.
Thru the process I learned about his living conditions. He lived in a shack upriver with no electricity. He ran an electrical cord from a neighbor's house a few hours a night, (with approval) and lived a very meager life up there in the woods separated from the community.
We will never know why he chose to live up there, or like that....... But I remember the heartache I felt when he explained how he lost his leg. I remember that he was proud of his service in Vietnam and I remember that I was sad for the way he was treated in return. Our Veterans should not be homeless, they shouldn't have to fight for the medical treaments, psychological services or the financial assistance needed when they are called up to serve us. We can and should do better by these people. They earned it and we will be defined by how we treat them.
I remember a Pastor telling us years ago that when that day comes that we meet our Maker it won't matter who we prayed to, what prayers we recited, if we went to church each week but we will be judge by how we treated the less, the lost, the lame and those left behind. I think this is exactly what he was talking about.
To all those servicemen that fought the fight so that I could sit here and be a jerk if i wanted to ( i don't) I offer my grateful appreciation. I wish I had more to give you.
Personally, I don't know anyone that died in service to us. But a very dear girlfriend, Carol lost her husband Chris Braun in the first Gulf War. He was a pilot in the South China sea when his plane went down. I always think of her and her daughters on Memorial Day. It's got to be a difficult day for them and I will remember them in my prayers. Not only did Chris lose his life, but Carol lost a beloved husband and her daughters lost a lifetime to know their Dad. It's as close as I come to personally grieving for the soldiers that gave it all so that I can be a jerk if i want to.
I stole the following quirp from Debbie's facebook post, it was worth the crime....
"If you are able, save for them a place inside of you and save one backward glance when you are leaving for the places they can no longer go."-Major Michael O'Donnell- In remembrance of those who gave all.
Years ago during the floods in NW WA where I lived at the time I was a Red Cross volunteer. My job was to help the people that had lost EVERYTHING to the wild rivers to get beds, new underwear, some clothes to wear, diapers, formula, basic toiletries and what ever they needed to at least survive until things could be sorted out.
I remember a man that came to sit at my desk. We introduced ourselves and I asked him how I could help him the most that day. He was stoic, and brave (or maybe it was excessive pride, I can't be sure) but he told me that during the night the river had risen so fast and they were evacuated quickly. Just as they were evacuated the river took his shack and tossed it into the river along with his leg. It was his prostestic leg. He was a Vet and it was the only fake leg he had. He told me of the fight he'd had with the VA administraion to get that one. They had told him he didn't qualify for a leg, even tho he'd left his REAL leg in Vietnam. If I remember right, the story got a bit complicated. Something about he was "eligible" for a replacement leg only every 10 years? He'd had to fight hard to get this leg and was very scared that he'd not get a replacement for the one the river took.
Thru the process I learned about his living conditions. He lived in a shack upriver with no electricity. He ran an electrical cord from a neighbor's house a few hours a night, (with approval) and lived a very meager life up there in the woods separated from the community.
We will never know why he chose to live up there, or like that....... But I remember the heartache I felt when he explained how he lost his leg. I remember that he was proud of his service in Vietnam and I remember that I was sad for the way he was treated in return. Our Veterans should not be homeless, they shouldn't have to fight for the medical treaments, psychological services or the financial assistance needed when they are called up to serve us. We can and should do better by these people. They earned it and we will be defined by how we treat them.
I remember a Pastor telling us years ago that when that day comes that we meet our Maker it won't matter who we prayed to, what prayers we recited, if we went to church each week but we will be judge by how we treated the less, the lost, the lame and those left behind. I think this is exactly what he was talking about.
To all those servicemen that fought the fight so that I could sit here and be a jerk if i wanted to ( i don't) I offer my grateful appreciation. I wish I had more to give you.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Welcome to my blog.....
HI EVERYONE! I'm joining the world of bloggers for a number of reasons! I have alot to say and I really think your lives will be better for hearing my thots. :0) It's just the kind of friend I am, ya know!! Besides....somedays while doing my work or driving I get these thots. They are random and often not connected to anything particular, but they drive me nutty. They stick in my head and won't go away. They stay with me thru the night and often are still there in the morning when I wake up and I'm stuck with them until they are replaced with a new, often random thot. SOOOO... I thot if i could give them a forum or a vehicle to get out of my head and onto a screen they would leave me alone sooner. It's worth a try, right?
Some days I will also share with you stuff that makes my life richer (or more comical). Things you might enjoy or would miss if you didn't know I told you. For example......Kim bought lunch at Whataburger today and while that isn't news shattering it made me happy! It was only the 3rd hamburger I've had in almost 3 years!! IT WAS NEWS!! And yummy!
But mostly today I am preoccupied with the oil mess in the gulf! For years I've been aware of the enviroment and our effect on it. Not real aware, but aware enough where I know that littering is bad, putting oil down the gutter is frowned upon. I know that the six pack rings hurt the dolphins and that I shouldn't pee in the ocean.
When I shop, I try to be careful about the products I buy. Bio-degradeable this, Eco-friendly that. I do what I can as one person. I was always pretty proud of myself for recyling (but lately I've been real lazy).
When I watch the news and see that oil spewing and the vast amount of chemicals dumped in the ocean to "help" the problem it makes me sad. It makes me sad that I didn't think more of the oceans before this. That I didn't pay more attention to them before they needed our help to heal. Will they ever heal? What about the people of the Gulf that depend on these seas for their livihood and life style? And the Pelicans!! I wish I had the power to make it ok for them. I wish we didn't have this crappy dependence on oil!
I love Maya Angelou's poetry. Till next time, Karen
Some days I will also share with you stuff that makes my life richer (or more comical). Things you might enjoy or would miss if you didn't know I told you. For example......Kim bought lunch at Whataburger today and while that isn't news shattering it made me happy! It was only the 3rd hamburger I've had in almost 3 years!! IT WAS NEWS!! And yummy!
But mostly today I am preoccupied with the oil mess in the gulf! For years I've been aware of the enviroment and our effect on it. Not real aware, but aware enough where I know that littering is bad, putting oil down the gutter is frowned upon. I know that the six pack rings hurt the dolphins and that I shouldn't pee in the ocean.
When I shop, I try to be careful about the products I buy. Bio-degradeable this, Eco-friendly that. I do what I can as one person. I was always pretty proud of myself for recyling (but lately I've been real lazy).
When I watch the news and see that oil spewing and the vast amount of chemicals dumped in the ocean to "help" the problem it makes me sad. It makes me sad that I didn't think more of the oceans before this. That I didn't pay more attention to them before they needed our help to heal. Will they ever heal? What about the people of the Gulf that depend on these seas for their livihood and life style? And the Pelicans!! I wish I had the power to make it ok for them. I wish we didn't have this crappy dependence on oil!
I love Maya Angelou's poetry. Till next time, Karen
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